9 Way to Deal With People You Don’t Want to be Around
We all have people that we just can’t stand. For some reason or another, they tend to get under our skin. In an ideal world, we would only spend time with people that we know, like, and trust. But, life happens and circumstances force us to spend time with people that we might not really want to be around, people that are difficult to get along with. I feel you, I have to deal with this every single day. But don’t worry girl, I got you!
Here are the different tactics that I use and that have helped me deal with the difficult people in my life.
If you can, avoid them
This one is simple. You don’t have to spend time with people you don’t like. But sometimes, we have to, right? Because this person might be a family member. But if you have a choice, avoid them altogether.
Accept the fact that you can’t change the other person
Don’t waste your energy on trying to change things that you have no control over. You cannot change or control another individual. Just redirect that energy to things that are more important, things that will benefit YOU.
Pick your battles
If you’re proving a point about everything, and I know, we’re always right and perfect, but that can get annoying and no one is going to want to be around you. Let some things go. Ask yourself, is this the hill I want to die on?
Control your action and not theirs.
Do this by concentrating less on the person’s behavior and more on how you react to this person. You cannot change other people, but you can modify the way you respond to the things that others do. For example, if someone is being argumentative with you, rather than engage, give attitude, or roll your eyes, you can just listen to them, with no reaction and no judgment. As a matter of fact, you don’t have to really be listening, you can totally tune them out! Then, when the person is done talking you can just acknowledge that you heard them and you move on. This way, you’re not rude and you’re not telling them to shut up. It’s not so easy to do but if you can master this one, everyone will just love you. 😂
Take a silent deep breath.
Sometimes it’s hard to control our feelings, especially when we are upset or hurt. But it’s important to take a few seconds and take a deep breath. Often times, you will find that when you let that moment of anger pass, you will not feel the need to react that way anymore. The key is, you can’t be too loud with your breath, that’s rude. Practice doing this almost silently. I did it seven times today!
Always act with love and chose peace.
There’s nothing to discuss here. If you stop to think if your action is out of love and if it will keep the peace, then you will ALWAYS win. I guarantee it.
Put yourself in their shoes.
This is a very important and very difficult trait to have, and it is essential to your success. Many people cannot see things from someone else’s perspective. Oftentimes, if you step away and try to see it from the other person’s perspective, you might actually see how your actions or the situation at hand might be coming across differently to other people. This will also help you not take things personally and might ultimately help you see characteristics/traits that you have which might need changing.
Detach your emotions from this person so his/her actions don’t affect you.
Specifically, reduce the power that person has to hurt you by adopting a don’t-care attitude. If you must work together, concentrate solely on the task at hand and interact with the person only when the work requires it. If it’s a family member, just remember, it’s not your fault, it’s not about you. Never take things personally. The other person is how he/she is because of troubles in his/her life or past, and that has nothing to do with you.
Lastly, always do some self-analysis, self-reflect.
There might be some things that you might need to change also.
